The OC Advice Panel
by ThymeWaster
Summary: My Original Characters from various showsmovies are being forced to run an advice panel. Oh the insanity! Rated for potential violence on the part of a certain XMen character...
1. Introductions

Ok, so I have this horrible habit of having all of my OC's talk to each other, constantly. I figured you might benefit from my insanity. It will at least be funny. I've seen a bunch of these advice column fanfics, and I thought I'd try it with my own twist. If I'm breaking any rules I don't know about them, please tell me!

Disclaimer: Um, I don't own the shows that spawned the ideas of these characters. Here's a list: Teen Titans; X-Men: The Movie; Ouran High School Host Club; Avatar: The Last Airbender; and Naruto.

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"Hello all and welcome to the first session of the OC advice panel. For those of you who don't understand the concept, this is where my OC's will answer any question, large or small, to the best of their abilities. Let's meet our panel!" ThymeWaster gestured across the room to a long table where five girls sat and stared blankly at her.

Pointing to the first girl on the far left, ThymeWaster began her introductions. "First we have Thyme! She lives in Jump City, is dating Beast Boy and her young son is what? Two now? Why don't you tell us a little about yourself?"

Thyme nodded and waved, her short blonde curls bouncing slightly. "I'm eighteen, my powers are control of time and nature, and my son is Logan. I'm a very motherly type and I like to garden." Unlike the other four panelists, Thyme had been prepared for the sudden movement into a new fanfiction.

ThymeWaster gestured to the next member and grinned wickedly. "Next we have Eternity! Currently residing in Xavier's mansion, waiting impatiently for me to finish her story. Eternity, tell us a little about yourself."

Eternity glared. She leaned her head into her hands and fiddled with her chocolate hair. "I'm Wolverine's daughter. I'm a third generation mutant, with all the powers of my parents and my grandparents. I can teleport, change the molecular structure of almost anything, transform into animals (though I don't do it that often) heal, and I have claws, and I wear these…" She flicked the purple sunglasses she was wearing. "To keep from looking people in the eyes, because when I do I see their past, present and future."

"That's awful!" Thyme cooed at her. "I'm so sorry, I wish I could help."

"Eh. No big." Eternity shrugged it off. "What's worse is getting stuck in a never ending fanfiction!" She glared daggers at ThymeWaster.

The reluctant host cleared her throat. "Ahem. Moving on. Our next panelist is fairly new to the gang. In fact, poor Kisa is so new that her story isn't even written down yet. Kisa, introduce yourself."

Kisa was a pale, raven haired beauty. She looked as if she was the enemy of everyone else in the room. "I'm Kisa Hitachin. No, I'm not a long lost sister, I'm Hikaru's fiancé. Deal with it. I'm from Ouran High School Host Club and I think those idiot twins are society's curse. But I have to marry him to save my mother and become heir to the fashion design company, my dream."

Eternity turned to her and gave a genuine smile. "I like you." She stated simply.

Kisa grinned sarcastically at her. "I don't like you."

ThymeWaster giggled. "I knew putting those two next to each other would be fun. Next we have someone you all know but not well. Princess Amikara of the Fire Nation! Ami is betrothed to Prince Zuko, but at the age of seventeen she is on the run from the Fire Nation, just like her lost friend. Ami, please?"

Ami looked around and felt extremely confused. Trying to remember everything she learned from three years of political training, she began introducing herself. "Um, I'm a waterbender?" She spoke hesitantly.

"What in the world is that?!" Eternity leaned over Kisa and asked.

"I can control water, and turn it into ice." Ami explained quickly.

"That sounds great!" Thyme said sweetly from her end of the table.

"Great, now that the four of you know each other, meet Natsko. She's a girl from the Hidden Leaf Village, married to Kakashi!" ThymeWaster introduced the last member of the panel and glared evilly at her.

Natsko smiled shyly and looked down at the table, playing with her braid of light brown hair. "I'm Natsko, I'm twenty, and I think I'm the oldest member here. I'm blind, but I can see people's chakra, it looks like an outline."

"You poor thing!" Thyme exclaimed from the far end.

"Not really, I was born blind, so I've never known anything else." She smiled at Thyme, recognizing where the voice came from.

ThymeWaster cut the mics of all the panelists and continued. "There you have it, the five panelists. They are ready and eager to answer any question on any subject (Please keep it PG to PG-13.) You can write a question in a review or PM me! Watch out though, your question is fair game to ALL panelists. I have no control over what they are going to do with it." At this she glared towards Eternity and Kisa, who smiled innocently back at her.

"I will try to post once a week with answers to as many questions as the panelists can handle. Check back on Sundays for a new installment of the OC Advice Panel!" The lights in the room faded and the chapter ended.


	2. Pat Your Head?

Yello. I am slightly disappointed. Though the lack of hits/reviews is to be expected of such a random fic. There really is a plot/purpose to this story. It's actually a really good story to read BEFORE you read any of my others, it introduces all of my OCs and it kinda explains how I write/think and the personalities of my OCs.

I am alone a lot of the time, and I create characters, they talk to each other. It's fun because I like pitting them against each other. (I know I'm nuts, I'll admit it. Don't try and commit me, they won't take me.)

The other thing that I need to point out, is that each character I create is kinda an overexagerated facet of my personality. So each one of these characters is a small part of me, taken to the extreme.

Now that I've rambled on and on, enjoy! And PLEASE ask questions, they fule this fire that is my insanity.

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"Hello again!" ThymeWaster's perky voice could be heard in the dark room. "We have a small technical difficulty with the lights, but hopefully it will be back up and running soon. For now, let's move on to the questions we got from some interested readers!"

"Ya know, you really shouldn't call them that." Eternity chided her. "They are your two best friends, and they only did it because you begged them."

"Well, everyone has to start somewhere." Thyme's reassuring smile was lost in the darkness.

"Thank you. Now, our first Question is from1337StargateFan, she asks "Can any of you pat your head and rub your stomach at the same time?"" The lights suddenly flipped on to show Eternity banging her head against the desk and Kisa glaring at ThymeWaster.

Thyme sat happily in her chair, smiling and eager to answer. Ami looked deeply confused, and Natsko was attempting to pat her head and rub her stomach. "Anyone want to answer that one?"

There was an awkward silence. Then Thyme spoke up. "I can, but only if I concentrate really, really hard."

"What about the rest of you?" ThymeWaster flinched and recoiled, as Eternity was supposed to answer next.

"What kind of moronic question is that?!" The mutant yelled out. "Of course I can! Geez, You'd think that she'd assume that! All mutants can do that!" she folded her arms across her chest and sulked back in her chair.

Kisa watched Eternity's tirade and looked amused. When she finished, Kisa looked over at ThymeWaster with a sarcastic grin. "I can't, but I know Hikaru can, he asked me the same thing a few months ago. He felt the need to show off his talent. Honestly though, what does that have to do with anything?"

ThymeWaster shrugged. "I told them they could ask you guys anything. I guess she took that literally. Next!"

Ami raised an eyebrow and watched Natsko, who was still attempting the amazing feat of coordination. "I've never tried. It never seemed important." She gave it a quick try, feeling completely idiotic. "No, I can't do it."

"Ok then, Natsko, you've been trying for some time now, what's the verdict?" Natsko stopped patting her head and looked at ThymeWaster with a curious face. "When Thyme and Eternity were talking, I could do it, when Kisa and Ami were talking, I couldn't. I think I can do it if someone else can, but not if they can't. Does that make sense?"

"Not really." Eternity mumbled. Kisa laughed.

ThymeWaster cleared her throat and the lights cut out again. "Well, please excuse the lighting. We have another question from another OC! Rebecca, from QuietHermione's story "Of Mortal Dread and Sapphires" asks (for Eternity): "How do you put up with some of those munants? Some of them seem like a pain in the neck and NONE of them can understand all your powers? How do you keep from slashing them all to shreds?! Cuz trust me, there's this one guy-well, actually, there's several-that I would SO slash if I had your claws...""

Eternity grinned; though in the dark it couldn't be seen. A "shing" noise was heard, the distinctive sound of extending claws. "Who do you want me to kill?" She asked a little too eagerly.

"That wasn't the question."

"Fine." The sound was heard again as her claws were retracted. "I put up with them because I have to. I live with them. Plus, they understand me better than those normal people. Ugh, don't get me started on them! As for the slashing them to pieces, the professor won't let me." The lights switched back on, and Kisa and Thyme were noticeably farther away from Eternity than before.

"I would if I could, but I can't." She sulked again. Apparently this was a very depressing thought for her.

Natsko looked over at her, horrified. "How could you say that?!" She burst out. "Killing people is no laughing matter!"

"Says the wife of a master ninja." Kisa glared at Natsko, who blushed profusely and sat back down. The lights cut off again.

"WHAT THE HECK!?!?!" Eternity and Kisa yelled out unison. "WHO'S MESSING WITH THE LIGHTS?!"

Another "shing" could be heard. "If you keep saying what I say, I swear I'll kill you!"

"Eternity! Calm Down!" Thyme yelled at her as if she were a three year old. A lot of thuds and scraping was heard and the lights clicked back on.

Kisa was hiding behind Ami and Natsko, who were both posed to defend her. She was the only one in the group without some special combat training or powers.

Eternity was on the floor, pinned down by Thyme, who was on her hands and knees over her. She kept blinking to stop time around the mutant and keep her from getting away.

If the imminent death of one of her characters wasn't a threat, ThymeWaster would have burst out in hysterics. As the situation stood, she thought that the best course of action was to find out who was messing with the lights.

She left, hoping that Thyme had things under control, and found the control room, a strange back room with lots of switches and knobs. "Who's messing with the lights?!" She asked the seemingly empty room.

"I was just playing with the dials. I wanted to know what they did." The blonde walked out from behind a large soundboard. She was tall, with almost white hair and green eyes.

"Thalia? What are you doing here?" ThymeWaster seemed surprised.

"I want in! I'm an OC, and you didn't invite me." She gave the reluctant author the biggest puppy-dog eyes anyone had ever seen.

"You know I can't. If I let you in, we have to track down Urania, and if we track her down we have WAY too many characters, plus, I already have Kisa, and her story hasn't been written, I can't have another unknown on the panel."

Thalia pouted. "Fine. But I'm staying here until you get me a story and then you will HAVE to put me in the panel."

"Fine. Just leave the lights alone, please." ThymeWaster left the girl pouting in the control room and returned to the main room to see that all the panelists were back in their seats, though Kisa was watching Eternity warily.

"I'm sorry about the lights. It won't happen again. Now, I think that's it, so until next week, this is your OC Advice Panel! Please, PLEASE ask us some questions!" With that, the lights went out, intentionally, and the chapter ended.

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Thalia is very special to my friend's in California. She is my Harry Potter character, and she has some... issues. I'm not going to post her story because it KINDA resembles Titan's Child in a weird way. I'm not sure how most of you would take it, and it would probably be rated "M".


	3. Endless String of Questions

All of the questions in this chapter came from the four main characters of QuietHermione's "Of Mortal Dread and Sapphires". It's a really good HP fic, with loads of potential. I have a link to it in my favorite stories, go read it. Now.

Disclaimer: Do I really need one on this story?

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The lights flickered on to reveal the panel, but no host. Apparently ThymeWaster is missing from this session. Thyme looked at the others and hoped that they could do this alone. Kisa cleared her throat determinedly.

After a few minutes of silence, Eternity jumped out of her chair and began yelling. "Where in the world is she?! We can't do this by ourselves dang it!"

"Actually, she gave me a list of questions to answer. She says that she has a nasty headache and needs to rest." Thyme shuffled some papers that hadn't been there before.

"That is SO not true. She's burning a DVD of Ouran on her computer. I know it for a fact." Eternity popped Thyme's perfect bubble.

"What? She left you in charge? Why? Because you're the oldest?" Kisa glared daggers at her.

"I am not the oldest, at least, not age wise. My story has been around the longest, but that's not the reason. She left me in charge because she doesn't trust either of you." She pointed at Eternity and Kisa. "And those two," She pointed towards Ami and Natsko. "Can't read."

"Rub it in why dontcha?" Ami sulked in a very Eternity-esque pose.

"Anyway," Thyme ignored her. "Our questions today are all from QuietHermione's OC's from her story "Of Mortal Dread and Sapphires". Each one of her four characters has questions for us all, and they are supposed to be read in a specific order." She flipped through the pages and found the first one. "From Richard: Do you like animals? If so, which one is your favorite?"

Eternity glared at Ami for stealing her pose and then addressed Thyme. "I like cats. They are independent and attach themselves to one person and one person only. Plus the claws are awesome."

"Kisa?"

"Dogs. They are loyal, never cheat on you and they don't play idiotic practical jokes!" She banged her fist on the table in front of her and muttered something about her stupid fiancé and his stupid twin.

"Ok, you and I need to have a talk later about obsession. Ami, what animals do you like?" Thyme was eager to move on.

"Well, I like the Giant Koi fish, but I never get to go see them. Then there's the ostrich-horse, but that's more of a necessity than a liking. I like koala-otters though. They are cute and they like water." Ami seemed pleased with her answer, but the other's just stared at her blankly.

Natsko decided to end the silence. She didn't like quiet. "I don't like animals that much, but they seem to like me. Kakashi has a few dogs that come around every so often and they are nice."

Thyme sighed. "That took longer than I thought. I like any animal, as long as it's green." She grinned slyly.

"I HEARD THAT!" Beast Boy yelled from somewhere off-stage.

"Next question, or should I say, questions: These are from Kevin: Do you sing in the shower? Do you sleep in class? Have you ever killed someone? Have you ever died? Have you ever eaten vomit flavored beans? What's your favorite knitting pattern? Do you like your hair? Are the Weasley twins your idols? Are you- suddenly muffled by duct tape." She looked at Kisa. "Why don't you go first?"

Kisa glared at her and then spoke as sweetly as she could. "Only Maroon 5 songs, I used to, I'm not in school anymore, No, though I would like to kill Hikaru and Kaoru, no, I wouldn't be here if I had died, I don't want to know what those are, I like a diamond pattern but basket-weave comes close second, yes, it's nice, I hate twins! DON'T EVER SUGGEST THAT TWINS ARE MY IDOL! I'LL KILL YOU!!!" She broke out in a rage and stormed off.

"Um… next?"

Ami tried to answer the questions. "What are, "Shower" "Class" "Vomit flavored beans" "knitting" and "Weasley"?"

"Let's just say she's never killed anyone, died or done anything you suggested, except maybe liking her hair." Thyme was getting bored. "Natsko?"

"I do sing in the shower, but not when anyone else is home; I never slept in class; I would like to keep my past a secret, especially when it comes to murder. I don't condone violence in any way. I think asking if we've died is silly, since we are all here and alive. I don't know what vomit flavored beans are, and I can't knit, I have no idea what my hair looks like, so I don't know if I like it or not, and I don't know who the Weasley twins are, but I'm sure they are lovely people." She babbled off in rapid fire.

Thyme was regretting the author's statement that they would answer ANY question. "I don't sing in the shower, I do sing while cooking though; I never slept in class; I've killed people, well, really only one person, and he had it coming; I'm obviously not dead; I've had a vomit flavored bean it tasted nasty; I can't knit; my hair is ok; and the Weasley twins are interesting." She tried to get it out in one breath.

Eternity caught her cue and immediately answered. "Why would I tell you any of that crap? It would be admitting that I've done something wrong! Geez kid, I'm glad someone duct taped you."

"As to that," Thyme was ready to move on. "Let's hear from the next person, Lilly: What is your worst fear? And sorry about my brother."

"Let's start with Ami, what is your worst fear?"

Ami sat forward and leaned on the table. She looked down at her hands and began to cry silently. "That Zuko will come to harm, or that he and I will never be together again. I miss him so much!" Here she broke out in full blown tears, and Natsko tried comforting her to no avail.

"Natsko, what about you?"

"I'm afraid that I won't be a good wife, or live up to the expectations that are put upon me. I'm afraid that if I fail, the people around me won't love me anymore." She sniffed a little and a few tears rolled down her cheeks. She looked at Ami and the two began crying together.

"I guess I'm next." Thyme watched the two crying girls with concern. "I'm afraid of being alone, without any friends or people who care about me at all." She remembered the times when she was alone, and tears began to well up in her own eyes.

Eternity watched the three with growing interest. "What happened to being afraid of thunder, or snakes?" She looked around her at the tears. "Oh, fine, I'll be afraid of something deep too. I'm afraid of fire, because it killed my mother and I'm afraid it will take away everything I love all over again. That satisfy you all?" Thyme nodded, and as Eternity watched the others and thought about her fear, she turned away to hide the small trickle of tears.

Kisa returned from her tantrum and saw the four crying girls. "Aw damn it! Do you all really care about people that much?" (She could hear the conversation from where she ran off too) "I'm afraid of being completely dependent on other people for money and survival. I want to be able to make it on my own so I don't have to rely on those rich idiots!" She sat down in her spot and produced a box of tissues from under the table. "Can we move on now please?"

Thyme sniffed and pulled out the last piece of paper. "This is from Rebecca: What irritates you the most? And I'm sorry for that guy, too. I wouldn't even bother answering all those questions, just pick the ones that are the least lame. If any. He's an embarassment to wizards everywhere." She read it over again. "I'm assuming she is referencing Kevin and the endless string of questions."

Natsko knew it was her turn to go first. She untangled herself from Ami (Who was hugging her tightly) and started. "I'm most irritated by people who think I'm helpless because I'm blind."

Thyme sat up straight in her chair and spoke next. "I'm irritated by people who don't communicate well." She glared at Eternity.

"What?" Eternity said, concentrating hard to keep tears from rolling down her cheeks. "I'm irritated by fanfiction authors who won't fix plot-holes or come to their own dang fictions!" Her tears were lost in anger.

Kisa knew immediately what she was going to say, but Ami cut her off. "I swear, if I hear another word about that idiot Hikaru, I'll kill you myself!" She yelled out at Kisa through her tears. Once she collected herself she answered the question. "I'm irritated by people who don't understand my connection with Zuko." This spurned a whole new set of tears and Thyme was forced to end the chapter for the sake of the readers, who are probably getting dripped on.

* * *

Ok, so, for some reason I was in a bad mood (I think my toe hurt from surgery) and so I wanted to cry. It kinda leaked out onto the story.

Um... WARNING: The next chapter has been contributed too by a very violent friend of mine, who is playing a game called "Three Objects of Death" with my characters. It won't be plesant... Though it will probably be hysterical.


	4. Birthdays and Boyfriends

Sorry this is so short, I feel like crap.

Enjoy!

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"Welcome! I'm back!" ThymeWaster exclaimed joyfully from her place alongside the table. "Today we have some interesting questions, one from a recurring questioner and one from a friend in California…"

"GET ON WITH IT!" Kisa yelled at her from her seat. Eternity nodded in agreement and Thyme shook her head at both of them.

"Ok then." ThymeWaster continued. "Our first question is from Rebecca, again."

"Put a lifelong ban on her!" Eternity interrupted.

"I'll skip over the commentary that goes with it, except for the fact that Lilly was upset that you all cried over her question." ThymeWaster ignored Eternity.

"We're sorry, we can get really emotional sometimes." Natsko apologized before Kisa could comment.

"Thank you. Now, the question is, "Do any of you know when your birthday is? If so, when is it?" Any answers?"

Thyme started, as usual. "Actually, I don't, though the Titans celebrate it on Logan's birthday, May fifteenth."

Eternity tacked on her answer to the end of Thyme's. "Yup. November eighth."

"Kisa?"

"August Eighth. ThymeWaster's favorite number is eight."

"Ami?"

"It's sometime in summer. I never thought it was all that important." She smiled lightly.

"Natsko?"

"February twentieth."

"Ok, now that that's settled, let's move on." ThymeWaster stared anxiously at the group before her. She heaved a great sigh and dove in, unsure of where this would lead. "Suzanne, from California, asks what would happen if you all and your significant others hung out together. So, for the sake of this question, we are going to bring in the men and experiment!"

The five girls' jaws dropped and they all turned around as five men came up behind them out of nowhere. "First we have Beast Boy with Thyme. Then Colossus with Eternity. Sadly, Hikaru came when called for Kisa. Zuko was pulled out of exile just for this, enjoy your time with him Ami. And last, Kakashi is here for Natsko."

"HELL NO!!!" Kisa jumped out of her chair and stared angrily at Hikaru who grinned mischievously.

"No swearing please." ThymeWaster knew this was going to happen.

Colossus was by far the largest one there. Beast Boy looked confused, as always. Hikaru was holding a book over his head like a shield. Zuko stared dumbfounded at Ami, amazed at seeing her again after so long. Kakashi couldn't look more disinterested as he read his book and glanced over at the others only every so often.

"For the sake of my sanity, I will be pairing the couples off. Thyme and Beast Boy go with Eternity and Colossus, Ami and Zuko with Kakashi and Natsko. Kisa, Hikaru, you two just… stay."

Eternity grabbed Colossus' arm and dragged him off to one of the smaller tables that were set up off to the side. "Let's get this over with."

"Wait…" He stopped her and pulled out her chair. "I want to meet these people. You never introduce me to your friends."

"For good reason." She mumbled.

Thyme and Beast Boy walked over to the table with their hands held. When they got there, Beast Boy took Colossus' example and pulled out Thyme's chair before seating himself. "So, what's up dudes?"

Thyme took it upon herself to make introductions. "Beast Boy, this is Eternity and her boyfriend Colossus." Colossus shook Beast Boy's hand and looked at him quizzically.

"So, what made you green?" He asked bluntly. This triggered a laugh from the smaller boy.

"Genetic mess up." He replied calmly.

Eternity sulked in her chair and Thyme beamed while watching the two young men getting along splendidly.

"Well, you're no fun. Let's move to the other table." ThymeWaster was disappointed.

Ami and Zuko were sitting as close as possible without becoming indecent. Natsko looked at the two of them but didn't say anything. Kakashi read his book in silence. Oddly enough, they all seemed fine with the arrangement and the silence wasn't awkward in the least.

ThymeWaster was completely disappointed in all of her characters. They were actually behaving for once. She turned to the middle table where Kisa and Hikaru were still standing, glaring at each other.

"Maybe we should continue this next week?"

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Review!


	5. Cold Hard Facts, and Poker

Yeah, I know, it's short. I'm sorry. I forgot about it completely until today. I'll have something better next week.

* * *

"We left off last week with the boyfriends joining us and, unfortunately, getting along. Let's see how things are going this week." ThymeWaster smiled and flipped the lights on.

Ami and Natsko's table was pushed up against the main table, as was Thyme and Eternity's. They all sat around Hikaru, who was dealing cards. "Ok everyone, Ace's high, five card draw." He spoke cheerily.

Kisa was slumped in a corner, glaring darkly at the happy group. "I can't believe him, playing poker with them!" She had an aura of deep hatred surrounding her.

"Well, let's leave the guys here for now. But today we are going to have some fun. First, we are going to list the characters in specific orders." ThymeWaster watched the group and decided not to interrupt them. "First: Age. The youngest is Eternity at sixteen. Then Ami at seventeen. Thyme is eighteen, Natsko is nineteen and Kisa is twenty.

"Next is height: Natsko is the shortest at 5'1"; then Kisa and Thyme are tied at 5'4" Eternity is 5'6" and Ami is 5'8".

"Oddly enough, hair length is next. Thyme has the shortest hair, it is chin length. Ami's hair is shoulder length, Eternity's is a little bit longer. Kisa and Natsko both have hair that reaches their lower back."

"I WIN!" Thyme exclaimed in the middle of ThymeWaster's speech.

"Moving on. Hair color, from lightest to darkest: Thyme is blond, Ami's hair is muddy brown, Natsko's hair is chocolate brown, so is Eternity's, and then Kisa has jet black hair.

"And last, eye color from lightest to darkest. Ami, Thyme and Natsko have light blue eyes, and Kisa and Eternity have dark brown eyes." She heaved a sigh of relief. "That's over and I didn't have to get anyone else involved. My life is good." She looked at the next request on her list. "Oh crap. I have to make them all switch bodies!?" Her scream brought the others back into the world of this fanfic.

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Enjoy. Review. It's boring and random.


	6. Move to the Right!

Ok, so, I'm really sorry I didn't post last week. (not like anyone is reading this anyway...) I really, really, REALLY didn't want to write this yet. I promise, next week will be much more entertaining than this week, though I may or may not answer any questions. I am still waiting for some info from two people. cough

If you like this, please review. I am really just writing it to get myself into a habit of posting at least once a week. Enjoy the insanity!

* * *

We left off two weeks ago with a poker tournament and some interesting facts about the characters. Today, the boyfriends are locked back up in their pen and the girls are ready for the next question. Which really isn't a question, it's more of a request.

ThymeWaster shook her head and looked at the panel of innocently smiling characters before reading the question. "MaxRideNut's character "Max Ride as the American Dragon" asks: "What would happen if your characters paired off and switched bodies and/or powers with each other? I think you should experiment to find out.""

"Honestly Max, I don't want to try. But I guess it's the only question I've got, so I better do it…" ThymeWaster turned to the group. "Ok, this is how this is going to work: I will wave my magic stick, and you will switch bodies. You are just going into the body of the person on your left, Natsko, that means you are going into Thyme's body." She took a deep breath and pulled out a gigantic purple stick. She held it in both hands and waved it around for a few minutes.

Her efforts were met with several screams and swears that won't be repeated here. When she finally had the courage to look at the characters she began to giggle under her breath.

Thyme's body (Occupied by Natsko) was staring at everyone in complete shock. Since she now had the power of sight, she could actually tell what everyone looked like. She looked over at her own body and finally spoke. "Do I REALLY look like that?" Her voice came out as Thyme's, but the inflections were all Natsko.

Next to her was Eternity's body, occupied by Thyme. She had her claws extended and she kept writing things in the table. Kisa's body (really Eternity) kept yelling at her for the misuse of her powers. "Look you! My body isn't supposed to be treated that way!" She yelled as she slammed her fist into the table, breaking a few fingers.

Ami (Now Kisa) jumped at her. "NEITHER IS MINE YOU INGRATE!!!" A waterfall that wasn't there earlier was now flowing angrily down the wall behind her. When she stood, Kisa revealed the slightly revealing outfit she was now wearing; a very short pink skirt and a matching "shirt" that looked more like a sports bra. When she looked down at herself she turned a deep shade of scarlet and sat back down almost instantly.

Natsko's body (now Ami) was crying. She no longer felt her connection to water, and on top of that she couldn't see. She watched her old body jumping around and waterbending and she couldn't help but cry. She also had long hair again, something she missed so much.

The real Natsko stood up and began walking down the line, trying to force colors to stay in her memory. She looked at each and every character with keen interest, hoping that when she went back to her body, she might be able to see them all as they really were.

Thyme was now playing with her new body by experimenting with her powers. Once she was bored with the claws, she tried healing. She cut herself with a claw and watched it grow back instantaneously. It was amazing. Right as she was about to cut off a toe, Eternity grabbed her arm and began swearing at her.

For being in a normal human body only five minutes, Eternity had managed to do a lot of damage. There were cuts and bruises and several broken bones. The real Kisa next to her was so furious that the room was filling with water, while Ami kept crying and trying to wish herself back into her old body.

"Well ladies, I think that's enough." ThymeWaster was SO ready to end the chapter and the miserable excuse for entertainment. Plus, if she let it go on any longer, Eternity was going to try and kill her own body; if Kisa didn't drown them all first.

She pulled out a different stick (same size, green this time) and began waving it around the same way as before. All the character's moved one body to the right this time and everything was back to the semi-normality that we call fanfiction.

"Well, that was… interesting." ThymeWaster put away her magic sticks and read her note-cards again. "What is this?! "Torture My Characters"?" She flung the cards across the room and stormed out. As she left, mutterings of "Will need help" and "Can't control them by myself anymore" could be heard.

* * *

Ok, so I already have two requests for chapters (though one of them may take more than one chapter...) but I will still take questions/ideas for what to do with these six. PLUS: In future episodes: More of my OC's will be introduced, One OC will leave the panel, and several more appearances by characters from the ACTUAL shows will ensue. AND: as an added bonus, Oh snap... I'm writing shiver ... Stargate...

I will now procede to go dunk my head in a vat of Sprite in an attempt to wake up my underactive imagination.


	7. YOU'RE WRITING STARGATE!

Yes! I'm back! And on a Tuesday no less... Oh well, at least I'm updating. There is really nothing worthwhile to say here except "Enjoy the random"

EDIT: Whoops! Forgot to put a gigantic disclaimer on this one: AHEM:

Disclaimer, pt1: I do not own Stargate: Atlantis or the character Kate Heightmeyer, she's from Stargate: Atlantis.

Disclaimer pt2: GIGANTIC SPOILER WARNING!!! Do not read this chapter if you haven't read "Those Who Loved" It will ruin the story for you. So go read that! NOW!!!

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The six women woke up in a strange room. Each one was seated in a chair at a long cafeteria table. As they began to look around they saw that the room was much larger, and lighter than the one they were in before. ThymeWaster sat on the table Indian style and stuck her face unbearably close to each character's face as they woke up. "Wake up sleepy heads! We have a story to do!"

"Shut your pie-hole." Kisa barked at her. She was still bitter and in pain from the injuries Eternity inflicted on her body last week.

"Where are we anyway?" Thyme rubbed her face and yawned.

"We're in the new setting for the story. We had to change to a neutral zone. Plus, since that incident with the body-switching, we needed to move. Kisa kinda flooded the place." ThymeWaster stood up and jumped off the table in her excitement. "But now, we have to move on to the next reader-suggested plot twist!" She pulled out her stack of papers and looked at the one she had been dreading for weeks.

"MaxRideNut's character Ultima wants to know: What would happen if all your characters got dumped in the same world, and had to live with the TransFiction Counselor?" She smiled. "Well, we have made a few changes, though I think I get the concept of the question. First, let me introduce the world: We are now in the cafeteria of Stargate: Atlantis."

"WHAT THE HECK?!" Eternity, Kisa and Thyme all yelled in unison. "YOU are writing STARGATE?!"

ThymeWaster sighed; she knew this was coming. "I lost a bet. 1337StargateFan asked me to write this in Stargate: Atlantis, and I have refused to do things for her in the past, so I figured I'd throw her a bone."

"Um, not to be a bother, but shouldn't we be introducing the strange woman standing at the other end of the room?" Natsko asked, finally waking up. She pointed in the direction of the end of the room and tilted her head.

"First, someone wake up Ami." ThymeWaster pointed to the sleeping waterbender and then jumped off the table and went over to the woman standing in the doorway. Kisa slumped back down on the table. She was tired and weak, she had three broken ribs and several stitched cuts from her body's encounter with Eternity. Natsko poked Ami and tried to wake her, to no avail.

Finally Eternity walked around the table to her and smacked her across the head. She was rewarded with a nice squeal and a scream from Natsko as Ami waterbended around her, drenching the poor blind girl.

"Guys, or, should I say "ladies"? This is Dr. Kate Heightmeyer. She's a psychologist and supposedly she can fix all your problems. She is here to listen and help you all, so please be nice to her and be on your best behavior." ThymeWaster introduced a blond woman wearing a gray uniform. She was a little bit short and seemed extremely calm in contrast to the characters before her.

"Pleased to meet you." She began. "I'm sure I will enjoy getting to know you all on a very personal level, so let's get started, shall we?" She sat down in a chair that appeared at the head of the table and ThymeWaster sat at the foot. She (ThymeWaster) pulled out a half-finished, fuzzy, pink scarf and began knitting.

Thyme, Eternity and Kisa all sat on one side of the table, Thyme next to Dr. Heightmeyer, Kisa by ThymeWaster. The others sat across from them, Ami next to the Dr. and Natsko near ThymeWaster. "Who wants to begin?" The uniformed psychologist asked the insane characters.

There was a moment of awkward silence as the characters all stared at one another. Finally, Natsko volunteered herself for the first "victim".

"What problem would you like to solve?" Kate asked politely.

"Well…" She hesitated. "I guess my biggest problem is that I don't feel like people accept me for who I am."

"Why is that?"

"My mother is always blaming my blindness and calling me lazy, my Dad always seems like he feels sorry for me, and the entire village thinks I'm some psycho killer because I went crazy at the Chunin exams."

"Those are all valid reasons, but think about it, is there someone in your life who accepts you no matter what?" Kate took a few notes and waited while Natsko thought.

"I think so, my husband has always seen me for who I was and not cared. He married me even though I was blind, and he made changes to his life to make mine easier. He's never once felt sorry for me, or scared of me. YES! He does love me for who I am!" She jumped up with joy and ran out of the room looking for Kakashi.

Eternity sighed and put her head in her hands. "Well, I guess SHE can die happy now." (BAAAAD PUN!!!!!)

ThymeWaster dropped her knitting and went running after her and caught up with her in the hallway. "Natsko! Where are you going?"

"Home! I don't need to be here anymore!" She waved and walked head first into a wall. After a quick recovery she stood and smiled. "Besides, I'm not technically one of your characters anymore. So wish them all the best of luck from me!" With that, Kakashi came and took her arm and walked her out of the fanfiction.

ThymeWaster went back into the main room and glared at Kate. "If all of them leave after being "healed" by you, I'm suing your sorry butt."

"Duly noted."

"NEXT!" ThymeWaster shouted. After seeing the results of Natsko's "session" they were a little more eager to try it out. Ami offered herself to the mercy of Kate.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" The doctor asked simply.

"I'm a waterbender, princess in the firenation, my boyfriend has been banished and I have no other friends besides him. What can you do with that?" She sat on her hands in excitement.

"You have attachment issues, you can't (or won't) attach yourself to more than one person for fear of losing them. You also have an inferiority complex because you are different. My suggestion is to find yourself some girlfriends, go out for coffee and talk to them about your problems, you don't need me." After her monologue was over, Dr. Heightmeyer sat back and sipped at a cup of coffee that randomly appeared before her.

Ami leaned forward onto the table and considered this. "Wow, I really DO need friends." She muttered to herself.

"Ok, last one for today." ThymeWaster was ready to be done writing for the day.

"I'll go." Thyme suggested.

"Ok, what are your major issues with your life?"

"My boyfriend wants to get married, but I don't want to just yet-

Kate cut her off. "And why is that?"

"He's a Teen Titan and I don't want to take him away from that. If we get married he will have to move in with me and he won't be able to go on missions with the team."

"Have you told him this?"

"Yes. Several times, he just won't listen." Thyme hung her head. Kate jotted down a few notes. Thyme decided to continue where she was headed in the first place. "Then there is my son, I'm worried that I won't be able to raise him properly since he has so many powers and quirks to him."

"Your son will love you even if you make mistakes. No matter how odd he is to the world, he's your son and you love him. That's all that matters. You will learn how to raise him as you go." Kate smiled at her. "As for the boyfriend, have you tried compromising, say, an engagement until he can leave the Titans?"

Thyme thought about this. "That might work…"

ThymeWaster held up her finished knitting and grinned. "That's all for today folks! Next time, we will have Kisa and Eternity's match up with Dr. Heightmeyer. Plus, since Natsko left us, a new character will be joining the panel!" The lights flickered off and random pandemonium was heard as the characters all tried to find an exit in the dark.

* * *

I am still going to try and update on Sunday. I just need to get something from 1337StargateFan. If you are reading this: SEND ME THE CAMEO!!!

As always, I need material so please read and review!


	8. Coffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffee

Yello! Ok, so the majority of this chapter is random and psycho. I didn't write all of it, the scene with Rodney was written by 1337StargateFan. She's awesome.

Read and Review, Oh, and if you LIKE "Stargate: Atlantis" and haven't seen any RECENT episodes, then this has some spoilers. #Mutters something about crazy psycho sci-fi fans#

Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Stargate. I am not associated with anything related to Stargate. I am repulsed by the fact that I wrote it. Why on earth would I try and claim it?

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"Welcome back to "The OC Advice Panel"! Today we are going to continue the therapy sessions, starting with Kisa.

"Why me?" Kisa whined from her spot at the long cafeteria table.

"Because you lost the rock paper scissors game." Eternity smirked.

"Let's just get this over with." Kisa grumbled. Thyme and Ami both sat on either side of ThymeWaster, watching her knit something orange and fuzzy.

Dr. Kate Heightmeyer sat at the other end of the table and smiled politely at the two girls she had left. "Well, what do you want to work on Kisa?"

"Nothing you can help me with." Kisa grumbled.

"And why is that?" She responded calmly.

"You aren't a lawyer." She said this as fact.

"Why would you need a lawyer?"

"I want to divorce my husband. Either that or murder him, either way I need a lawyer." Eternity chuckled at this.

"Why do you want to leave you husband?" Kate asked over the chuckling.

"Because he's a complete ass." Kisa said, straight faced and bored.

ThymeWaster raised her head and said one word of warning. "Swearing!" Kisa took the hint.

"Have you ever thought that he might be nervous around you? I was told yours is an arranged marriage, I'm sure he is just as scared about it as you are." Kate assumed this would be as easy as the first three.

"Uh uh. He's mentally deranged. Him and his psycho twin. There's no way he's nervous about this." Kisa stood and literally LEFT the conversation, wandering to the end of the cafeteria where she found a coffee pot and some mugs. She drained the pot and took a mug back to the table where she sipped it, ignoring the psychologist and leaving Eternity to fend for herself.

"Well, since Kisa has no interest in my help, let's move on shall we?" Dr. Heightmeyer turned to Eternity and smiled hesitantly. She didn't want to die, but if that was her fate, she would accept it.

"My biggest problem is that my story is going nowhere and what it does have is filled with plotholes!" She began at a yell.

"Well then your biggest solution is to work this out with ThymeWaster. ThymeWaster, could you pay attention please?" She nodded at the girl who sat at the other end of the table.

"Sure." She looked up from her knitting and saw Eternity glaring at her.

"I just need confirmation that my story is going somewhere!" Eternity screamed.

"It is, I'm just considering story rehab. Including some character changes." ThymeWaster waited for the inevitable tirade.

"WHAT CHANGES?!" Eternity called out.

"Nothing to your personality, people like you too much. But some changes to your powers and your history, maybe a little plot difference. I'm thinking of taking the claws away."

Eternity turned bright red in her anger, but she tried to restrain herself. She sat back down and fumed silently.

Rodney walked into the cafeteria and headed straight for the coffeepot in the far corner muttering to himself, "Why don't they move the darn pot closer to the door? Don't these people realize I'm wasting valuable time walking all the way across the room when I could be saving the galaxy!" _Then why don't you skip the coffee?_ He growled menacingly at the inner Sheppard voice, "That's not even funny."

He reached his destination and pulled the black tab to fill his mug with precious liquid. Drip, drip, drip. Empty. Rodney's face reddened and he turned to face the rest of the room. "Alright! I am going to ask this once and someone had better have a good answer! Where is my coffee?" No response, smart people. He spotted a table of six women sitting nearby with what appeared to be an over abundance of energy and coffee cups. He stormed over and introduced himself to the only person he recognized, "Kate, where is my coffee?"

"Dr. McKay, I'm in a session right now."

"Fine. But where's my coffee?" random silly thought: Why's the rum gone??

"Dr. McKay, I'm really very busy right now, you need to go away." Rodney spied a movement from the corner of his eye, one of the women was lifting a mug towards her lips. Kisa. "Hey stop! Is that coffee?" He quickly moved around the table and was already invading her personal space before a girl with purple sunglasses stood and blocked him. "Hey! Get out of the way, I need my coffee!"

"Hey there Bub! Get out of her face! It's just coffee!" Eternity scowled at him.

"Dr. McKay, please, just go. I don't want a scene." Kate pleaded.

Rodney stared at her for a split second before he started his rant, "Bub? Do you know who I am? I am Dr. Rodney McKay, Chief Science Officer and Most Important Person on Atlantis. I have saved this city from Wraith, Replicators, Genii, and countless idiotic so-called scientists that have tried to blow up the city with their sheer stupidity! That is MY coffee so give it to me!" He finished with a roar.

Eternity whipped out her claws (as they were currently still a part of her character) and growled at him. Rodney watched this girl with amazement for a brief second before she began to move towards him, at which time he sprinted out of the room to find Sheppard.

"That really wasn't necessary E." Kisa folded her arms across her chest and closed her eyes in a very knowing way.

"I know, I just want to use these puppies while I still can." Eternity looked lovingly at her claws.

"I promise, I'll give you another power that is just as destructive and threatening." ThymeWaster smiled at Eternity.

Eternity considered this for a minute and then sighed. "As long as I can still be me, and have a threatening power, then I guess I can accept this." She looked over at Dr. Heightmeyer and was shocked to find that the woman had disappeared.

"Where'd she go?" Kisa voiced the question they were all thinking.

"Well, on Friday in the actual Stargate: Atlantis TV show, Dr. Heightmeyer died. We only had a few more hours until this plot became completely ridiculous, we can't bring people back from the dead after all." ThymeWaster explained calmly.

"So, who is this new character that's supposed to come today?" Thyme asked, trying to change the subject.

"You'll have to wait until next week." ThymeWaster smiled and ended the chapter.

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Ok, so, I AM making some major character changes to Eternity. To the extent that I might even change her name. But she will still be Wolverine's daughter, and she will still end up with the same guy. The plot that I haven't written won't change much, but what has already been written will probably go through some MAJOR overhauling. Watch out for it and let me know what you think.


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